Have you ever stopped to ask who, or what you are? It seems an odd question to ask. But please, humor me. We live a life that is so focused outward on the activities and aesthetics of our lives that we seldom look inward at ourselves for any significant reason. I gave this some thought the other day and came to the realization that much, if not most of the time, I as well as many others have no idea how to answer this question. We fall victim to a series of lies and misdirections that keep us away from the awesome truth of who and what we really are.
The first temptation, and the one I struggle with most personally, is the temptation to think that "I am what I do". I AM a teacher. I AM a student. I AM leader, friend, or youth minister. I AM (insert responsibility here). Simply put, we identify ourselves by our jobs and positions. Well, what happens if you lose your job? What happens if you rid yourself of responsibility? What happens if you don't do that job well? Do you cease to exist? No! We are something greater than anything we can do or say.
We're also tempted to think that "I am what others say about me". This is a hard one to fess up to, especially in our individualistic society, but imagine the following scenario. You give a presentation to a group of 50 people. 49 say how great the presentation it was, but one person says he hated it. He say's you wasted his time. Who are you going to remember? It almost seems, at least in my own life, that I identify myself with the NEGATIVE things others say about me, and try to do better. However, I don't try to improve in an effort to better myself. I'm trying to better the things people say. It's another lie! We can be so focused on the things that people think, that we will begin to reflect those feelings, or even overcompensate to improve other people's opinions. This is a black hole we simply cannot fall into.
The third and final temptation that we fall into is to think "I am what I have done". We look for affirmation in our achievements. Look how many trophies I have! Look at the good I've done in my church/community! Look at my degrees. The danger here is that it keeps us looking behind us. And why not? The past is concrete. It's safe. We know everything to know about yesterday and always will. But what happens when we seek comfort in our accomplishments to the point where we ignore the present? The lie here is that there is a past or a future. There is only now. The past has faded away, and the future is only a vague idea of "nows" to come. The only thing that really exists, and the only place where salvation can truly be found, is the present moment.
Can we see the lie that runs rampant throughout all three of these temptations? It's that we ARE external. We ARE only what we can feel and touch with our two hands. We are what we can do. The enemy is playing us! What we ARE far outstrips anything that he says we are. We ARE beloved sons and daughters of the Lord, God almighty! Think about that for a moment. At the Jordan, when Jesus was baptized, the voice of the Father came from heaven saying "This is my beloved son, in whom I am well pleased". He is saying that about every single one of us. We are loved by a God who thought us into existence and maintains us at every moment. We are beloved sons and daughters of God! Nothing we have done or can do can take that away. Nothing that anyone says can strip us of it. Let it sink in! We are children of the almighty God, and nothing less.
One final thought. When God spoke to Moses from the bush, and told Moses his name, he simple said "I Am who Am". He didn't say I Am Creator, or I Am Father. He only said "I AM". We are made in image and likeness of a God who just IS. I pray that we can all remember this truth, and live it in our daily lives so that, at the end of time, He can look upon us and say "This is my beloved child, in whom I am very well pleased".
May the Lord, or God bless us
St Joseph, model of manhood, pray for us
